Dear Dennis:

Please help me, I do not know what else to do. My child just turned 10 and it has gone from worse to worse. She has been breaking into my neighbor’s house and took her friend's wallet and everything. Please help. — Alejandra

Dear Alejandra:

This kind of behavior in a 10-year-old is very alarming, and I would suggest she get some therapy and also perhaps an evaluation from a psychiatrist to see if there are any mental issues. If there is not, you need to tighten the ropes on her activities. She is doing these negative things because she is able to. That means the changes need to start with you and your spouse, if he is in the picture.

Posting rules and having consequences for breaking those rules must be standard procedure in your home. I would also suggest that if your neighbor did not file any charges, you also take your daughter down to your local police station and have her talk to the juvenile detective.

Hopefully you are near a B.I.L.Y. group because support is always of value, especially from other parents who are having the same or similar issues. Above all, you must not give up. She needs the structure and following through on consequences. You also need to keep close eyes and ears on her friends and perhaps a call to her friends’ parents if this behavior continues. Check our web site under references for some good articles. Good luck. — Dennis