Dear Dennis:

Our daughter (36) has gone through two inheritances through bad judgment. It was $30K the first time and over $100K the second. We are thinking of setting up a trust fund for her when both of us are gone. We have a son, and we were thinking of having him in charge of the trust. Do you think this is a good idea? — David

Dear David:

How can I answer this when I know so little of the details? I do feel that if your son is a responsible business man and you are comfortable with having him control the inheritances, then perhaps that is the way to go. There are also financial establishments that can be set up to handle your inheritances. Obviously, you would not be comfortable with just handing over a large sum to your daughter, especially with her past history of bad judgement. I always feel that a minimum amount spread over a long period of time seems to work the best, with an unused balance (in case of the death of the recipients) going to the next of kin with the same time frame of distribution.

I also trust that you will deservingly use a greater portion of that inheritance to enjoy your remaining years. Donate some to worthy causes and watch the growth of those organizations with your help. Paying it forward is a gift that so many fortunate people forget to do. To me, it is a blessing when you can help others and a journey that one must be on while they are in a position to help those less fortunate.

I know that personally, I devote every spare moment of my life in helping families in crisis. Because I Love You has saved my life and that of my children, and there is no amount of payment I can provide to ever pay them back for that gift. B.I.L.Y. has existed over the past 30 years strictly on donations and volunteers such as myself. It is my journey and my mission. My children will not have much of a monetary inheritance as I am not a person of means and live on a fixed income. However, I will be leaving them the richness of knowledge on how to spread love to others less fortunate and to see that groups such as B.I.L.Y. continue to flourish.

Thank you for writing to me and I wish you a long, healthy, and enjoyable life ahead of you before you have to put your plan into action. Best of luck. — Dennis