1. Set family rules on drug and alcohol use (early, when child is in grade school or even before; remind everyone often of the family rules. An important fact: all of the terrible problems caused by alcohol and other drugs can be prevented completely by not using alcohol and other drugs.)

2. Establish consequences for violations of these rules (as loss of privileges).

3. Set aside a time every day to talk with your kids about what is happening in their lives, how they feel, and what they think.

4. Help your children establish personal goals. Simple and achievable, short-term as next week and long-term as next month - - - help your children to accept and learn from their inevitable failures.

5. Know your children's friends, and spend time with them and their parents. Socialize together; share your lives. This does not mean that there is no time for separateness for adults and children.

6. Help your children feel good about themselves and their achievements, large and small.

7. Have a system for family conflict resolution. Parents are in charge, and their decisions are the rules. Parents carry their authority best when they are open to appeals from their children. Establish a process for review, such as seeing a religious adviser, a mutually respected member or friend, or a counselor if conflicts develop, using same system for conflict between parents themselves.

8. Talk about your children's futures early and often. Help your children know that they will soon be out of the parental home, paying their own bills and making their own rules. Children become adults when they leave their parent's homes and financially support themselves, not when they get a driver's license.

9. Enjoy your kids (accepting and appreciating that each child is unique with interests, abilities, and goals that are different from you and anyone else).

10. Be a nosy parent! Ask your children questions; know where they are and who they are with. Let your children know that you are being nosy because it is your job as their parents and because you love them.

http://www.becauseiloveyou.org
E-mail any questions to: bily1982@aol.com

****************************************************

We wanted to thank you for visiting our site. We hope the information you received from the reference Library helps! Just to let you know, we have a book called "The Program". It may help you with many situations if you cannot find or attend a group in your area. The cost of the book is $ 12.00 (English Version) $ 14.00 (Spanish Version) and your check is 100% tax deductible. Please send all Book orders to: BILY P.O. BOX 2062WINNETKA, CA 91396-2062 Please make your Tax Deductible check payable to: BECAUSE I LOVE YOU or BILY this address is for book orders only. Once again, thanks for stopping by, Because I Love You the Parent & Teen Support Group This message is in full compliance with U.S. Federal requirements for commercial email under bill S.1618 Title III, Section 301, Paragraph (a) (2) (C) passed by the 105th U.S. Congress and cannot be considered SPAM